journeying

It is day 6 of 7 of my journey on the ‘ultra simple diet’ and I haven’t been miraculously healed.  Sigh.  But it’s not for lack of trying.

I have stuck to this thing — even the 30 minutes of daily morning Pilates, the mid-day walk, the late night restorative yoga, and the nightly epsom salt/baking soda baths. That’s on top of drinking the olive oil/lemon juice combo every morning and eating mostly rice, vegetables, and chicken all week.  It has been a full-time job!

I will admit that I have had the energy to do all of the exercise and the cooking required for this regimen.  So that’s something.  I will also acknowledge that I have fallen into bed each night dead tired.  Zonked.

So what have we learned from this little exercise?  I am not sure yet.  I will go back and see the doctor on Monday.  She should have some lab results by then.  Also, I think I will learn more as I attempt to add foods back.  I am not the typical ‘customer’. I had already eliminated gluten, dairy, and soy from my diet for most of two years. This week took out nuts, beef, pork, most of my fruit, any starch other than rice, most of my caffeine, all alcohol, all sugar, …

So what am I going to add back first?  The doctor said to be gentle with myself over the weekend until she sees me, but I am going to have to have some popcorn.  And some raisins/dates.  And probably a glass or two of wine.   I won’t have a cheeseburger or a steak, but I might have a baked potato.  I won’t eat pizza, but I may have some scrambled eggs. I eyed the clementines sitting in a bowl on my countertop today and thought to myself, “Two more days.”

I’ve been on a strict diet for a week.  I’ve been dealing with chronic pain, fatigue, and a variety of other annoying symptoms for two years.  It sucks. (Sorry, Mom.) But this morning a friend from the past sent me a photo of the car she was in during a crash in 2008.  She then described the journey to relief/healing she has been on for six years — back surgeries, physical therapy, steroid injections, etc.  That sucks, too. (Sorry, Mom.)

We all have our stuff, don’t we?  We have physical issues, emotional issues, family issues, work issues.  Yours don’t diminish mine.  Mine don’t diminish yours.  We are all on a journey of trial and error.  We’re trying to figure out life — how to hurt less, how to live more.

And we are not alone.  We have each other to lean on, to share with, to encourage. And we have the Creator of us all, who knows each and every hurt intimately.  He is aware of when we are having good days and bad days. He knows the stuff that we won’t say out loud to anyone.  He hears our cries — the loud ones and the silent ones. He wipes every tear from our eyes. And sometimes He uses us to wipe those tears.

Today is a good day. My pain and fatigue are about a 2 on a scale of 1 to 10.  But I know people who are closer to an 8 or a 9.  Perhaps today I will be their tissue; perhaps tomorrow they will be mine.

Isaiah 25:8

The Sovereign Lord will wipe away the tears from all faces;

He will remove His people’s disgrace from the earth.

The Lord has spoken.

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